Is That a Uhaul in my driveway or ARE YOU in Love with ME?

MOVED!

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 11:47:00 +0000

I moved to Wordpress.
http://nibsandinny1031.wordpress.com/

Caution: Bad MOOD ahead!

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 09:57:00 +0000

I am having a terrible, no good, very bad morning! I know.... I know..."change your thoughts and change your day." I don't want to self help my inner child. She is entitled to revolt every once in awhile.

I must have woken up on the wrong side of the bed last night.
Who thought of that? I guess I shouldn't care because it will be my excuse for the day. Come to think of it I use that bullshit a lot. I can't wait until Friday.

Is it Friday yet? If I blink three times, like Dorothy her heels on The Wizard of Oz, will I STILL be sleeping in my favorite position? Wouldn't it be grand if we could get three fantasy wishes a day? I want to think creatively, if I swallow a Red Bull with some potent java magic MIGHT happen. Words are hard to sort through in my mental file cabinet at the moment.

As I greet the new day, I may just decide to stew in angry thoughts.
They rev me up like some metal bands.
It does not take much for me to boil over with negative energy.

Today it involves McCain, his anything goes attitude and cannonball comments, his PR reps who do double duty with damage control and the GAYS. It is quite comical to watch him spit out sewage ,seconds later his peeps air freshen the Universe.

I need to get me a PR rep. In fact, that would be a "fantasy" wish for Hump Day! Imagine how my world would move if I HAD a PR REP helping me through my blunders, bleeps and bloopers. Especially while I'm working. There is way to much male hormones stuffed into the small office that I occupy. They make the usual "dumb blonde jokes", It's Carmel coloring dammit! I slide in a dig from time to time. Sometimes they tilt there head like my confused Wheaten Terrier. Enter DAMAGE CONTROL DIVA, she got it "going on" (3 snaps in a Z formation people). Her quick witted mind is no match for them.

I blink three times, and I am back to reality. I am ready to face the day.

Random

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Sun, 06 Jul 2008 18:50:00 +0000

I need to post. I have to push myself into the writing rhythm. Also, because even though I am still "tippin' my 40" I need to push "Bozo the Clown" down a few post, he scares the shit out of me (in my whisper voice).

Let's Talk:

I just read that Jessica Alba had a baby girl. Where was I under a rock?
Jessica "Holy Hot" Alba had a baby a few weeks ago, and I have seen recent pics of her, she looks better than anyone on the planet. I don't care how she is losing the baby weight. Hell, I wouldn't mind if she uses her index finger while hurling the calories down the porcelain god (although I would be concerned and shocked reading about it on digg.com).
This is one "delish" picture of her, I don't care if this is before baby, give her credit where credit is due people and salivate.

Last, I was pleasantly surprised to read that Jessica named her child, Honor Marie. We actually KNOW an Honor Marie, folks! In fact, when the kids were smaller, since Honor Marie is our middle child's age (and BFFL), they created their own band and made a song called, "HONOR MARIE".
Jessica call us if you need someone to sing a sweet lullaby.
Meee meeeee meeee meeee meeee mmmeeeeeee mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmeeeeeeeeeee, getting the vocals ready J.I.C. "Honor Honor Honor Marie...."

Did you Hear?

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Fri, 04 Jul 2008 01:01:00 +0000

Bozo the Clown is dead. Let's tip the 40's and get out the lighter's and give MAD LOVE to the man that I watched throughout my childhood.

"American Family Association Launches Boycott Against McDonald's For Promoting The Homosexual Agenda"

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Fri, 04 Jul 2008 00:20:00 +0000

American Family Association Launches Boycott Against McDonald’s For ‘Promoting The Homosexual Agenda’»
Today, the right-wing American Family Association (AFA) announced a boycott of McDonald’s. According to AFA, Ronald McDonald and his gang are part of giant gay agenda:

What the boycott of McDonald’s IS about

It is about McDonald’s, as a corporation, refusing to remain neutral in the culture wars. McDonald’s has chosen not to remain neutral but to give the full weight of their corporation to promoting the homosexual agenda, including homosexual marriage.

AFA is upset at McDonald’s for refusing to condemn Vice President of Communications Richard Ellis’s decision to serve on the Board of Directors of the National Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce (NGLCC). AFA President Donald Wildmon said the situation is “strange” because “it’s the family that McDonald’s appeals to — children’s playland, you know, all the little toys, all of that. And they are promoting a lifestyle that would utterly destroy the traditional family.”

So far, McDonald’s is holding strong, writing a letter to Wildmon on May 29 and rebuffing his attacks:

We treat our employees and our customers with respect and dignity, regardless of their ethnicity, religious beliefs, sexual orientation or other factors. We support our employees’ personal involvement in organizations of their choice.

Although AFA tries to make clear that it is NOT protesting McDonald’s “hiring homosexuals” or “homosexuals eating at McDonald’s,” as Good As You notes, “Whether it’s a direct attack on gay customer or employees or an attack on particular employees role in a pro-gay capacity, this situation is still about the company supporting diversity (something the AFA resists at every turn).”

AFA has a long history of silly, offensive boycotts against, among others, Wal-Mart (for selling “Brokeback Mountain” DVDs), Ford Motor Company (for advertising in gay-friendly publications), and the American Girl dolls (because the maker contributed to a youth organization that was pro-choice and supported the acceptance of lesbians). In 2005, it called off its unsuccessful nine-year boycott of Disney (for its “embrace of the homosexual lifestyle“).

McDonald’s should follow Disney’s lead and ignore the right-wing protests. After all, during the nine years AFA was boycotting Disney, the company saw record profits.

Digg It! (by Amanda-http://thinkprogress.org/2008/07/03/mcdonalds-boycott/)

Gay Marriage News for New York

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 01:33:00 +0000

Court's Gay Marriage Ruling Will Test Paterson's Policy
New York State Politics
By JOSEPH GOLDSTEIN, Staff Reporter of the Sun
June 23, 2008

The issue of gay marriage in New York is returning to court today, with a panel of appellate judges in Brooklyn scheduled to hear arguments on whether the state must recognize same-sex marriages performed elsewhere.

New York State currently does not permit gay couples to marry but has, for the most part, recognized unions that have been performed out of state. Just last month, Governor Paterson took steps to ensure that all state agencies recognized gay marriages performed elsewhere.

But whether the Legislature or the courts will allow Mr. Paterson to set the policy on this issue remains to be seen.

The case being heard today, Godfrey v. Spano, will consider whether recognition of same-sex marriages first requires approval from the Legislature. So far the Legislature hasn't passed any laws relating to gay marriage.

Whatever decision the Brooklyn appeals court reaches in the Godfrey case is sure to be quickly appealed to the state's highest court, the Court of Appeals.

The lawsuit, which is being litigated by a Christian legal group based in Arizona, predates Mr. Paterson's pronouncement. It is a challenge to a similar marriage recognition policy by the Westchester county executive, Andrew Spano. The suit, filed in 2006, is brought in the name of four Westchester county residents who say the policy brings "injury and mischief" to local taxpayers because it will extend spousal benefits to the spouses of gay county employees who entered into same-sex marriages out of state.

Massachusetts and California are the only two states that perform gay marriages. Canada also conducts such marriages.

New York State has long recognized out-of-state marriages between men and women who are not eligible for marriage in this state. In one oft-cited precedent, the state recognized a Rhode Island marriage of an uncle and niece. The main legal question before the court is whether that principle applies to same-sex unions.

The case may well turn on how the court defines marriage.

A lawyer for the Arizona group, the Alliance Defense Fund, argues in an appellate brief that this marriage recognition rule "does not apply to same-sex unions, regardless of whether they are labeled a 'marriage,' because a same-sex union, by definition, does not qualify as a marriage." In support, the group's lawyer, Brian Raum, quotes from several dictionary definitions of the word "marriage," including one popular in the 1700s.

A gay rights organization, Lambda Legal, which represents a gay married couple from Westchester in the case, argues that the marriage-recognition principle must extend to gay marriages.

"This action should be recognized for what it is — a bald maneuver to impair the rights of lesbian and gay New Yorkers by ideologically motivated plaintiffs and counsel who cannot countenance that government officials are applying New York law evenhandedly to these residents," a Lambda Legal lawyer, Susan Sommer, argued in an appellate brief.

The Alliance Defense Fund recently filed a similar suit challenging Mr. Paterson's marriage-recognition policy. The group dates back to 1994 and was founded by prominent evangelical Christians, including the evangelists William Bright, D. James Kennedy, and the president of Focus on the Family, James Dobson.

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Sun, 22 Jun 2008 12:31:00 +0000

Scolding me on Facebook that I can't keep up to my end of the bargain in BLOGland... well I NEVER! (whispering the last few words while looking up in my "nini" way, hurt and embarrassed).

You know how my MIND works by now, either the voices are all in order with one thought leading the way OR they come quickly scattered with A.D.H.D symptoms.

Chew on this pic for awhile! I JUST know my poetry leaves you perplexed & alone with many questions. LMBBAOA!

Dude, I was thinking about the time that I had the "lunch box" book(remember 'Nember the pink book with the oral sex "how tos" that Tom got woozy from and had to retreat to the bedroom???). Remember 'Nember on "MY Space" I was like if you listen to Rick Springfield "Jesses Girl" their will be answers... please tell me you remember that funny ass moment where YOU actually believed that by playing "Jesse's Girl" record backwards (like a cult member)you would hear the answers to pleasure a woman.

'Nuff said~ my face says it all! Switches, me love you the longest of the longest time!

Eyes of a Child

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 13:57:00 +0000

It's 9:30 AM. He has been transported successfully to his destination, school. All is well in the Shlape household.
In this moment, I may find Zen. An hour ago I was serenity challenged. There were temper tantrums and tears (and that was just from the "Big Mama")and ring side seats for"five year old vs wreck of the week mama" battling.

It seems my voice does NOT intimidate him anymore. I pulled out my bag of "Mama" warfare and he challenged me until I surrendered.

My only question to him, while in our calm state, what happens? I want to be able to understand through the eyes of MY child how he can disappear into another world while presently walking through his day with ten tasks to go.
He has a goal, I turn around and he IS OFF running naked throughout freshly vacuumed rooms with plastic kitchen toy knives as his "karate" sticks. I prompt more than necessary for a 5 year old who has been doing this ALL YEAR LONG. Hollering ensues.

I wish I could not panic over deadlines. I long to be the mother who balances the world with one hand while defying school rules, BECAUSE she IS "SUPERDUPERDELICIOUS MOM" who has no time for piddly nonsense due to the fact she is fighting Global Warming/Healing the sick in her family/volunteering at the local soup kitchen ALL while working a FULL TIME job and putting a five course meal on the table by 5.

I worry. I fear the... duh.. duh... duh... LATE sign in BOOK. It is a book of failure. I hang my head low and sign him in. If I can't get my five year old "Red Devil" to school on time how will I EVER be successful enough to be a GUEST star on OPRAH? I admit for a few months I put some creative flair to my late book signing excuses: laundry piling up and son with fashion issues, needed chemicals to live (asthma attack), loves to sleep/hates to listen... After awhile I call my partner, again with my head hung low, and admit defeat "I signed the book again!" She knows my issues about the book. My need to be: “Practically Perfect Poppins”.

Today, I signed the book. Actually yesterday I signed it, too. My excuse: LATE. Do I really care at this point? 10+ more days of school and we have to worry about where we will place the BOY for summer camp. It's on my SANTA (means long mother hellion) LIST. My partner always says, "I guarantee that by the time he goes to college this will not matter."

This morning my son and I connected once again on the way to school. We talked about pacts broken and new finger promises to start fresh. I still long to know what goes on inside that five year old. Where he goes when the world is still moving?

In the end, I am jealous. I wish to be five again to live through the eyes of a child. They fight and make up with no grudges held. They have little worries of the future and live in a second to second time frame. They struggle to remember the past. It’s as if it has been “Etch-A-Sketch” from their cranium. Today does not have to play Peek-A-Boo with them because they are lost in yesterday. Today is their companion.
If I can JUST be happy in the moment and not fret over small things I will see things through the eyes of a child.
'Nuff said! Peace out peeps!

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Tue, 27 May 2008 12:13:00 +0000

You can't, you won't... you're just not going to get me uplifted this morning.
I have no positive point to make. I am grouchy. I am stewing in my own "Oh Woa is me" moments. Lack of sleep? I don't know. Robin decided last night to do what she does best, buy the generic of a product that MAY have needed more than a KING Kullen special. Hmm.. I let her go with it. I didn't make waves when she skipped up to the counter saving 2.00 bucks. But at 12 PM and then 3 PM I could not take it anymore. She snores! She snores like God bowls in a thunderstorm. I wake her and she says, "why did you wake me?". What a silly question. Why wouldn't I wake you? Would it be fair that I have to listen to the Earth collapsing every time your in R.E.M state? Just call me Maggie Mood Swings, she does. Although I like to think of her asMolly McSelfish. Today, I am not in a loving place with her. She will blame me. I will accept it.
Currently I will be late for work since I am focusing on blogging before career.
Although I am not exactly sure where I am supposed to be today. Once I can ask that internal question and get a response, I will gladly run accordingly to the goal line.
I think I am most cranky that I have to go to work today. There will be stress, lots of it. I will practice finding my BUDDHA from within.
Peace!

Running with Thoughts

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Mon, 19 May 2008 14:04:00 +0000

I don't just "run with scissors".
I run with thoughts while running with scissors and multi tasking my world.

When I am open to suggestions I see how easily and effortlessly I can self destruct. IF all the inspirational elites have sent their email newsletters to my mailboxes AND I ACTUALLY open/read them I am crawling toward the Surrender start line. IF I end my day with minimal OLD way thinking I am proud to say I have reached the Freedom finish line.
Unfortunately, MOST DAYS I am stuck half stalled AT MY start line CALLED"Sanity challenged with a stubborn streak".

My partner and I are NOW proud new members of Long Island Community Fellowship (www.LICF.net). For a few years, Robin and I searched through various spiritual movements JUST to find our NOW spiritual HOME. Robin likes to say, "I found a place to hang my spiritual hat". The first time we ventured to LICF in Bayshore we did a "drive by", we drove by, parked for a second, scoped out the place and then drove by again to the highway. The second time was Christmas morning. There were only two families since everyone came the night before, but we loved the message from the sermon. It felt like I needed that spiritual jump start. They didn't think we were going to be back. PRESENTLY, Robin and I attend faithfully every Sunday. WE ATTEND SOCIAL EVENTS,MEETINGS, VOLUNTEER AND Robin is also on the "Angels" Softball team. If I don't go (we had a MS Walk at Jones Beach one Sunday) I feel a part of me is missing. It is like family dinner on Sundays (not that I want to COMPARE OR relate my BLOOD family who has left me in the dust since I made a lifestyle change with my VERY accepting AND LOVING LICF family but you get it).

Yesterday Pastor Shane's sermon was "The Last Word". He talked about people desiring to have the last word in arguments.
I can relate, I am the last word girl in my relationship even if I have to leave the room and still talk about it OUT LOUD for my dogs, myself or the UNIVERSE. This is one of my dirty habits. It is my Ego's gifts and my PRESENT poison. IF I want to stay in this moment and lead a full filling life I have to get rid of my habits. Whoa! Tough work ahead of me.
Controlling, Obsessive thinking, negative nelly ranting and criticising are some of shameful character defects. The last word is my control tactic.

When I am ON, I see rainbows and everyone holding hands while skipping through the park.
When I am OFF, I see people pushing little old ladies into mud puddles.

Listening to Oprah on XM one fine bumper to bumper traffic day on the Island, Rabbi Shmulley's topic gave me the "ah ha" CLARITY moment. We are a nation of second to second fill me up with shopping splurges and thrill seeking affairs. WE max out credit cards and ruin relationships to seek fulfillment with our inner emptiness. What we forget is that the shopping spree ends with a bang after you get the bill and the fun filled tryst in the back seat of your lovers car fills you with more disgust and emptiness than when you started the addictions.
We lack "purpose" We are a nation of bored/empty lost souls with the only agenda being, THE QUICK FIX!

Pastor Shane at LICF talked about "The Last Word" not just being who can argue the longest, BUT if we KNEW our life would end tomorrow what would be our last words, our last thoughts, our last actions. Would we care about the worries, the complaints, the resentments, the control???? HELL no! WE would live, love and laugh till it was over.

Today, I KNOW that I USED TO live in my head because it handicaped me from finding purpose. I loveD the last word, because it kept me in a trick state of "well I am to busy to find purpose and live with passion, don't you see I am living everyone else's life, WHATEVER!" If I was to know my day would be coming I don't think the people that bother me would even be in my thought process anymore.

I GET IT! Maybe I "got it" before but in this moment I GET IT NOW, AGAIN! How grateful am I to be able to do it all over again with a blank slate? VERY!

My goal today: TO FIND MY purpose (first research what true purpose means)
To live in the NOW and stay out of my F^&*ing HEAD! 'nuff said!

If you need to CHAT I will be sitting in one of the rainbow chairs getting ready for the race of my life!
PEACE

Everything is Magic!

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Tue, 15 Apr 2008 11:10:00 +0000

As I traveled to pick up my son from our agreed upon location (1/2 mid point) on Sunday thoughts jumped around in my head. At first, I was disgruntled. I like listening to Oprah when Oprah is alive with positive self help gurus like Dr. Robin, Marianne Williamson and Eckhart Tolle. At this particular moment, it was centered around clutter/cleaning. Now I KNOW I can definitely benefit from listening to the helpful hints but I longed for the inspiration, the show that would call to my life. I guess it wasn't the right moment. The universe/God was calling me to reflect/meditate without steering off the road!

I remember starting this blog. It began as a healthy outlet to vent my frustrations with everyday family life. AT points, even in the midst of the quarrel/strife I wrote with humor. Thankfully, that type of creative "therapy" helped me hurdle over the difficult times. Soon my friends and family were reading it often times "hounding" me for more. I told them, "I'm not a machine. Words come when they are ready!"

Last May, I fell into what seemed like an abyss. I was slapped with court paperwork, right at my doorstep, and I lost my breath for a brief moment. I had to do much growing in spirit and mind. Amazingly, (it's a God thing I HOPE YOU UNDERSTAND) a woman from my old neck of the woods responded to one of my blogs. It was a period in my life where I felt the pity party should be centered on my sorrow; I had the wrong judge, lawyer... well life! I wrote about my misfortune, my son's misfortune-
Oh- WO is me! She wrote me a quick comment to email her. And so my life was re directed. This woman, although we don't exchange emails or correspondence anymore, was my "REASON". She gave me guidance since her life path mirrored mine. She went through the same court situation back in the 90's which was a tougher crowd for gay relationships/child custody/father's rights/dissolution of the hetero marriage....
She had my judge, she knew his work. She passed on a number. Magic happened!

The process took close to a year, I had to dig deep to find my strength many times. If it wasn't for my friends, family and MOST OF ALL my faith in GOD I would have hit bottom without getting up. Today I am blessed! The order has been signed. We are moving on. My life, although bumpy at times, is where God intended for me to be.

Sometimes I revert back to the "why me's?" pity party mind set. It is easy to find drama.
Most people want to just talk about their problems. They think their life is filled with more messes than yours. If you listen... really listen like Elmer Fudd hunting rabbits you will hear the familiar theme underneath the thick surface. IF you pull back the layers of the human condition there is a longing/needing just to be HEARD. People don't care if anyone is listening. They just want to use their voice. Maybe most people have been silent to long and now feel compelled to talk, be right, argue bullshit, shoot the breeze, control with vocal chords, speak their "rightness", cry their pity party... and the world moves with egos leading the way.

Yesterday, I went to a wake. He was ONLY 26 years old. I didn't know him well. I met him on a several occasions while he was dying. The doctors gave him "deadlines" for death. He reminded me of a gentle giant. I have been through tough times in my life. And I always managed to see people's true colors in the face of it. They look drawn, speak negative thoughts, cry of the injustices of their situation EXCEPT with him. What I can remember about our brief moments together at random events/parties he was selfless, thoughtful, empathetic, easy going, happy and "inspirational". Inspirational because even in my healthiest of moments the ugly ego of me can rear it's ugly head. I want to be right, I crave to be understood, I desire to be loved but most of all I want to control life. This is something I am learning to master, getting my ego out of the way so I can find the awakening! Once you are in the present there is a calm/peace, you are aware of others egos and it doesn't bother you. This is yet another situation that God intended for me. He was my "Reason".

My partner's youngest child can irritate me easily due to her ungrateful attitude and her constant negativity; usually I listen to her whine and throw countless pity parties throughout the day. Sometimes I argue with her because I want to inspire her/switch her method of thinking but her ‘ah-ha’ moment does not come. Usually she melts down from her own selfishness until you just can’t take the toxic vibes or she deflects and argues about all my faults. It is a match where there are only losers.
Today, I need to let go and just remember what he taught me. He taught me life is too short to worry about the petty bulls**t. I can’t change her. I can’t control her to laugh and just BE, be happy, be grateful, be positive, be alive, be selfless, be responsible, be love to all, be the change you wish to see in this world. All I can do is BE.

This morning I woke up to Tim McGraw's song in my head. NOW I am not a country bumpkin nor do I like the redneck way of life, but I heard the song a few days ago and it is fitting to the situation. "LIVE like YOU WERE DYING!" Shouldn't we all wake up with a grateful heart, positive steps and a song in our heart? Wouldn't it be grand if we could all just live like we were dying, think about turning the other cheek when someone wrongs us because we just don’t' have time to worry about being right?

To live with an ego mindset is a form of suffering. I don't want to suffer. I want to live like "E" did. He lived like he WAS dying feeling the MAGIC of every moment! So when you are complaining.. Complaining... can't stand you’re cramped up shoes or you just have the blues think about being grateful for your breath! It is a gift! So simple but yet we forget about that miracle everyday!
To me, in this moment, everything is magic!

A Reason, a Season, or a Lifetime

People come into your life for a reason, a season, or
a lifetime. When you figure out which one it is, you
will know what to do for each person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON . . . It is
usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have
come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you
with guidance and support, to aid you physically,
emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a
godsend, and they are! They are there for the reason
you need them to be.

Then, without any wrong doing on your part, or at an
inconvenient time, this person will say or do something
to bring the relationship to an end.

Sometimes they die.
Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.

What we must realize is that our need has been met, our
desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you
sent up has been answered. And now it is time to move on.

When people come into your life for a SEASON . . .
Because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace, or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount
of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; things
you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional
foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the
person, and put what you have learned to use in all
other relationships and areas of your life. It is said
that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Author Unknown

Every single creature is full of God and is a book about God.
Meister Eckhart

say what?

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 14:21:00 +0000

Things I am learning

I am on hyper mode in the thinking department. These are some of my thoughts:

* Never.. and I MEAN NEVER... respond to your life partner in THIS way while out at a business networking event. "Honey, Are you ready to go?" (ME)"Yes, we're ready to go?" My colleagues and group attendees stare with puzzled expression. (ME) "Oh she knows the committee members are ready, too" (as I touch my head with my two hands and wait for the laughter) - crickets soon follow! Do you think there will be referrals?

* If you have all or nothing tendencies it is BEST not to go on line renting and requesting at the local library. (FYI: I have about 7 books in my possession and 2 more as I type on hold waiting for me at my library branch).

* Even Martha Stewart can't help me with my Composting Challenges. I am a composting drop out three years running. I claim "THIS WILL BE THE YEAR", but with my coffee grinds in one plastic bin and newspapers and cardboard scraps in another I might buckle and buy compost at the local nursery.

* I can't take on a whole yard of crab grass, but I will arm myself with a box of garbage bags to stop the weed growth and pebbles to cover the problems. This is the year I will find that damn green thumb everyone keeps talking about!

* Why does "a safe place" have to slip from your memory bank when looking for that important object in the F*%#@ "safe place" at the LAST MINUTE?

* I can have a temper tantrum like a five year old while looking for THAT important object in the F*%#@ "safe place"!!

* Saying "I am wrong and you're right about that" is one of most difficult sentences to spit out when YOU BELIEVE you are ALWAYS right about "that"!

* Saying "I'm sorry that I__________" is the second hardest sentence to say when you ARE a STRONG WILLED POLLACK (like me).

* Therapy can be more than just a weekly co payment if you use it correctly (much props to my therapist who was dealt the lucky hand to deal with an hour of moi every week).

* Challenges don't make you stronger IT'S the Ass____ that keep popping up IN your challenges that make you one tough bitch!

* A month of "Zen"/gratitude and positive affirmations can all {POOF} VANISH with a five second phone call with your ex or ANY other annoying person that seem to keep jumping into your car of life.

* Boundaries and building walls ARE TWO VERY different things, which I am learning in therapy. Although building walls is often necessary when dealing with ex's, ass_______ or any person that you have to associate with that make you want to "build a freaking wall" in the first place.

Things I am learning about myself:

Even though I am not a "people person" when duty calls, and I am needed to fill in the role, I CAN be the greatest gay MC EVEN IF I am just as confused as the contestants on the panel (it's a "LGBT Newlywed Game" thing you probably won't understand).

I will always argue my point (my partner thinks I missed my calling as a lawyer)even if I have to take that dead horse, give him CPR to bring him/her back to life and then beat the dead horse ALL OVER again (it's a freaking figure of speech people).

I can use many tactics of self sabotage, and "I'll never tell" (in that scary movie voice) but it DOES involve me beating a dead horse, silent scorn and.... (fill in the blank if you think you can)

AND THE BIGGEST THINGS OF ALL THAT I AM LEARNING: Birth Control a one less cup of coffee makes me one sarcastic sista'

much self love, inner peace and LAUGHTER makes the world go round and round!

Disclaimer: Must Kiegel before watching this ....

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Sat, 09 Feb 2008 20:39:00 +0000

.....But only if you have poor vaginal muscles.
I found this from someone else's site.
Holy Hellion Batgirl, thankfully I have been blessed with excellent V.muscles!
BE prepared to laugh!

Mood swings

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 21:33:00 +0000

Today is not the day to blog, because ... well hmmm.. well dealing with my hurt/angry feelings due to other people's perceptions of me and scenarios that I have stumbled into- (quick recap: it sucks to be a future step parent in a blended lesbian stepfamily sometimes. Detachment is my goal.).

May you all realize that no ONE can love you the right way IF you don't love yourself first.
Hoping everyone finds inner peace, authentic self love and the ability to laugh off what others think of you!

Senior moments

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Wed, 30 Jan 2008 14:37:00 +0000

Does anyone get "brain farts" at 34? Those times when you forget what is in the oven even when you prepared a delicious tuna casserole for the last hour? The days when you forgot why you entered THAT room and you just spin around until the person or thing comes into visible view?
I am having these moments by the truckload. I am blaming it on my just starting out on the birth control pill days(it's a hormones/acne thing you might not understand). AT least I can laugh about it. I am not in sensitive- ready- for- attack/fantasy mode, I am still in reality.
I don't want to panic just yet, if there were 'OTHERS' wouldn't I NOT know about them (talking about the MPD disorder)? I seem to remember where my ego is at all times, it usually is the one screaming "I'm right about that!" or "I don't like this feeling of uncomfortable let me build a wall". I think I am safe with that DSMR personality trait, I am just having the usual "senior moments".
What I wish for today:
* I wish Tinkerbell could ring her bell and all the physical mess in my house would be cleaned up instantaneously.
* I wish my partner would get "balls" and find her voice (excluding me).
* I wish that everyone remembers their purpose today even if it IS JUST entering a room and knowing why they went into it.

Things I will work on ....

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Mon, 28 Jan 2008 17:29:00 +0000

Can you believe it is January 28, 2008?!
Reality check: (*Sigh*)I am just not consistent in blog land.
Honestly, I lack follow through with 75% of my personal life (ie: scrap booking, journal writing, painting, organizing ...), so it did not suprise me that I would have the same philosophy with blogging. I am like a borderline (BPD) patient with my all- or- nothing approach to writing on the WWW. My email activity and constant Internet "research" leaves me booked up for weeks at a time.
When I frequent the blog rooms, I notice my character defect: Principle of Balance challenged with a jabber jaw. I don't stop chatting even in BLOGLAND. I admire the bloggers with the two sentence blurbs. I want to be just like them. But with this blog going over the 4 sentence marker, I can only fantasize of how my life would be like if I JUST STOPPED THINKING AND TALKING (looking up in fantasy mode). I COULD HAVE BEEN A CONTENDER OR on my way to becoming a Buddha teacher. Whatever! This is me: the good, the bad and the chatty patty ME.
I want to have a point, I want to teach a lesson.... these are my mission statements and when I have no life lesson to poke fun at, I fall back into my usual writer's slump. Or I get the "ah ha" writing moments while I am stuck on the Grand Central going to meet my ex (blending my life for the child custody schedule). Time can be very inappropriate. My genius comes out when I am in the shower or running into the car while balancing my life in one hand and directing a five year old with typical listening issues to follow my pointer finger and voice to the car and not the road.. not the grass.. noo noooooooo not the patch of dirt with the bed of dead flowers. I can never just "get it" while I am sitting dormant with a pen/paper or laptop available, and by the time I can sit and reflect I lost the punch line.

My goal today: To realize that I am not in a teacher's position. Hell, I can't even manage to teach myself how to parallel park (work through the fear Jeannine work through the fear). I am not Buddhist nun and have no Wayne Dyer spirit moving through my system giving me the right to blog with a "purpose". I am little 'ol me living the usual blended lesbian step family life. I am focusing on spiritual and emotional growth- cleaning up "my side of the street" today.
I am scratching my skin wanting so desperately to have a point to this story, but I won't make one! No, I will keep this in fragmented Pollack form.
I can do it!
One .. two ... buckle .. my shoe .. three .. four .. shut the door(as I make silly noises with finger and bottom lip).
How you like me now?
to the peeps that know me and still hang out with me anyway:
much self love, inner peace and authentic happiness

see pic below- my hero

Enter Me

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Wed, 09 Jan 2008 14:51:00 +0000

Did it happen? I was asleep. No seriously I was asleep for the first time in my 34 years, I fell asleep BEFORE the ball dropped. My New Year's was awesome (any time I am with my family and my boy it's an event for my memory box), but I am no spring chicken. I know all you 40 something people out there will say, "What? a 30 year old complaining?" It's true, age is but a number and it's all in the attitude, but my bedtime says 9 PM. Currently my 92 year old grandmother can beat me at an "up all night" marathon. However, in my defense my grandmother ALSO puts the phone off the hook and sleeps until late in the afternoon. I, however, have to deal with constant insomnia battles (waking up around 2 AM and staying alert until almost 4 AM). I tried the tricks, the multiplication tables, fantasy of naked women jumping over fences ... which usually leads me to stress about money from the number counting and home repairs thinking about fences. Also, I have an obese Cocker Spaniel that is distracted by scents and is ready to eat once my partner starts moving for a better position.
So on New Year's it was the same scenario, although I promised myself I would NOT fall asleep just rest my burning eyes on my son's pillow. We both fell asleep to Sponge Bob on Nick. I awoke to the Cocker sniffing my breath and a heavy duty knot in my shoulder blade from sleeping on a very tiny twin with a child who has issues with keeping his hands and feet still throughout the night (I thought Roy Jones Jr TKO'd me).

Ahhhh so it happened, the New Year rang in with bells and whistles and a sinus infection for both me and YES MY partner. I have to mention her or she gets very upset that I don't INCLUDE HER when talking about my illness issues-it's a CODA thing you wouldn't understand.

Well I did have a life in December, although I did not record it. There was laughter, heartache and an overweight man (not Santa Claus) who wreaked havoc on my emotional state for awhile. But I think we learned something valuable... hmmm.. nope not yet but I will get back to you on it. What did I do? Let's see, I painted a room which had already been painted two times prior. I didn't like the colors. Us creative spirits need constant color changes. However, I forgot how time consuming it is to paint. Half the room is done. I figure I'll get it around to it. Right! I painted my office stairs (Woo Hoo goal finally accomplished). They had been primed white for about a year or two. One day, I said "Enough!" and ran down to the local paint store for a rich brown color.

Today as I look around the house, I realize I have become a housecleaning drop out. Rooms that smelt of a medley of organic cleaners now stink like the wet dog who got a bath this morning. Floors that used to brag "eat off me" now say "Caution: protect your feet"! Between the court, mediation and the family sick states my mommy talents need fine tuning. I have lost the skills of goal orientation and multi tasking. I used to be able to leap tall buildings in a single bound while applying my makeup. I think I need a vacation. The last time my white DUPA (yes I am half POLISH people) saw a "vacation", I had to Zen myself for a week stay at my parents in a retirement community in Delray Beach, FL with four children. It was my "job" to keep them happy and clean from my mother's OCD neurotic cleaning mindset. I took many bathroom trips that vacation where I was able to fall to the floor and visualize "what would Buddha do?". The plane ride was an interesting journey, too. It's not easy dealing with a four year old who wants to play musical chairs in a plane while a 7 year old nephew had an obsession with the plane's bathroom. At least the girl's were busy watching the movies on their TV's. NO, when I say "VACATION", I mean me and my lesbian luvvaaaa frolicking naked (hmm I seem to have many naked fantasies) on a deserted beach or somewhere in a gay friendly area, while singing a very badly versed version of "I wanna come over" while falling down in a sexy embrace and "loofah'ing" our porcelain "dupa's" on white sand. I need a vacation just from thinking of that scenario!

So enter ME this morning. My son jumps into my arms from his sleepy slumber. I feel the mommy love. I am all about it. I forget about the stubborn knot still housed in my right shoulder blade. I turn a blind eye to the wet Wheaten tracking wet paws throughout the house. I am in the mommy zone.
Then he breaks the news to me, and might I say NOT GENTLY.
"I want to take the bus!"
What? Nope didn't hear it correctly, my dependent five year old is now an independent traveler. I say "are you sure? Because if you don't take the bus you can watch some morning shows!" Yes people I will stop at nothing. I know... I know.. but sometimes a parent MUST use their college degrees and dammit I am a psych major! The usual TV marketing/manipulation never graduated to blue print stage. HE was off and running jumping out of pajamas and yelling for me to help find some outfits.
Gone are the days where my son looks at me and says, "Mommy I love when you take me to school and pick me up." Now he is a "big boy" with big boy plans. He's five years old and already flat lining his good ol' mom. I can see the teen years but FIVEeeeee (breaking into a whisper). Then when all hope was lost an angel flew in. He came into the kitchen and said "you can pick me up from school"
I don't mind the scraps.
Remember:

“Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.”

Well I promise I won't let another month go by without my usual lengthy life moments caught in blog land!

Practice makes perfect

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Tue, 13 Nov 2007 12:10:00 +0000

Did you read below?
Since I have been involved in a painful court process for custody of my child for the last 6 months I feel the need to carry around and memorize while practicing "letting go" to the best of my ability. Yesterday as I emailed my regular positive "uplifters" to selected email buddies I scanned through my address book and saw my life journey. My email address book saves all email entries, it was an eyeopener. As each one I scanned I remembered just where I had been and how I felt at that moment. Documents and emails sent to my partner's ex regarding numerous school and FYI documents about her children (many times it was a sense of urgency when it had to do with the 'out of control' teen living under her roof). Then there were customer service numbers from various companies, whether giving me an ounce of trouble or a moment to just say thanks for the great service.
And as I scrolled, I saw the journey I had taken with my custody case to past teacher's my son had previously gone to requested by the judge to probation officers for last minute discussions either defending my name or adding "just one more thought" to the "the reason he shouldn't have school days" list. And I realized that THIS is an awesome example of letting go. I have court on Thursday.
My soon to be ex stirs in his bitter brew and parents my child through trickery and bribes, because he just can't let go. He wants to win at all costs to hurt me without even taking into consideration that there will be a wounded child left to pick up his own pieces. I am tired of fighting with the insanity of court, ex and court workers for my child's "BEST" interest. The proof is in the paperwork.
Whether they can see it or NOT cannot be my job or journey.
I MUST let go.
Two more days until we go back and I can fret about "what will the law guardian say?" or "how will it all pan out?" But in the end I must move out of the way and just let God be.
My biggest issue lies within my need to control all. I want to move the players to where I think they should be so it will make the journey more comfortable, and it also allows me to stay focused on THEM and not me. I stay stuck living in fantasy mode not following my dreams or accomplishing goals, because my FULL time job is controlling the situation/people.
Today I am going to re-read and find comfort in just letting go.
Knowing that my son will have his own journey, because God made him for that very reason.
I know it all sounds good on paper, it is a bitch to actually work it and follow through. But as I move to the next minute I can only get wiser in the realization that it just wasn't working my old way, and now it's time to let go.
Letting go does not mean not to care. Letting go does not mean to abandon.
Letting go, for me, is to stop the worrying, fretting and fearful thoughts that consume me. Letting go means moving the safety net, trusting in faith and just jumping in with arms wide open to the possibilities (which are endless)- CALLED life!

L-living
I-in
F-Faith
E-effortlessly

Feel free to choose your own LIFE message here: ____________________

SHE LET GO

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Tue, 13 Nov 2007 12:05:00 +0000

She let go. Without a thought or a word, she let go.

She let go of the fear. She let go of the judgments. She let go of the confluence of opinions swarming around her head. She let go of the committee of indecision within her. She let go of all the 'right' reasons. Wholly and completely, without hesitation or worry, she just let go.

She didn't ask anyone for advice. She didn't read a book on how to let go... She didn't search the scriptures. She just let go. She let go of all of the memories that held her back. She let go of all of the anxiety that kept her from moving forward. She let go of the planning and all of the calculations about how to do it just right.

She didn't promise to let go. She didn't journal about it. She didn't write the projected date in her Day-Timer. She made no public announcement and put no ad in the paper. She didn't check the weather report or read her daily horoscope. She just let go.

She didn't analyze whether she should let go. She didn't call her friends to discuss the matter. She didn't do a five-step Spiritual Mind Treatment. She didn't call the prayer line. She didn't utter one word. She just let go.

No one was around when it happened. There was no applause or congratulations. No one thanked her or praised her. No one noticed a thing. Like a leaf falling from a tree, she just let go.

There was no effort. There was no struggle. It wasn't good and it wasn't bad. It was what it was, and it is just that.

In the space of letting go, she let it all be. A small smile came over her face. A light breeze blew through her. And the sun and the moon shone forevermore.
~ Ernest Holmes~

Warning... this is just another bitch post If you can't handle reality please SKIP to the VERY END

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 11:09:00 +0000

Time is always moving me in directions, this morning it wasn't a pleasant one.
Most days I wake up feeling just like "Phil Connors" (Bill Murray) from "Groundhog Day". It's the same time and same place, my partner moves and the dog's scurry with clawed nails sounding like chalk hitting board they run back and forth .. back and forth... back and freaking forth until their OWNER/mother finally wakes up. But the sad and most depressing thing of all is that they NEVER let us sleep in on the weekends it is the SAME time every single day - starting at 5 AM the claws hit cherry wood floors, starting at 5 AM my life screams "there's gotta' be something better than this?" I am all about learning to be grateful but then there is the lesson on "why settle?" and "learn to love your life but don't just live like a pig in shit 101". I want to love this life, but these rooms breathe memories that I can never join. These dogs will always wake us up at the same time every day (partly because the Cocker has a sick eating issue and wants to start her day sniffing and searching for the food that falls from mouth and fingers). And I still haven't been able to witness more chubby toes learning to walk finding dog tails are a fun playtime (another empty promise marketing trick).
She has all these plans for us, for us to emotionally detox the negativity from our lives. It could work if I was into mystical medicines and chanting, BUT I am not! Instead I want to see improvement by selling the old, giving away the headaches of yesterday and starting fresh, she says it's what she wants but I have seen her when she is in "jibber jabber" mode. The house, it is one of the main sore spots of our relationship, she had fought for from her past. I am not sure what makes people fight when they leave spoiled relationships, maybe it is a chance to hold onto the last bit of memories. But it is that one thing that you hold onto so dearly that will keep kicking you in the face in your present. It is OK for her to live in this house where she ate with her ex, partied with her ex and fought with her ex but it is NOT OK with me. I can't tell you how many coats of paint that I have laid onto stained walls to hide my fears, to cover my issues. But it is the covering, the hiding that leaves me more troubled; because I can change a color, I can move a piece of furniture, but it is what it is and that is IT will never be my house and it will NEVER ever ever be OUR HOUSE. It is the house of "stuck". And her ex walks through new house with new memories, and I am more envious than a middle class teen wanting the high priced "labeled" wardrobe of her popular enemy. She bought her out of this mind trap with a 75,000 payoff to wipe her hands clean and start all over again. My partner thinking she got the better end of the stick is now seeing karma is a funny mother: house is broken down, a kid stays pissed and resentful, present relationship stays in a negative rut and our neighbors are chatty CATTY Cathy's. In my divorce I am letting him keep everything ... why hold onto toxic thoughts and past possessions?
So I can't really find a funny in this moment, it's not possible. She claims that she has goals but I know those goals are a gimmick to calm my storms for just "two more years". It seems perfect if I wasn't so perceptive, but I know better.
So this morning, it is the usual, dogs are up and running and she is like herself in every situation, which is she bends down and takes it up the "hoo hoo" to accommodate... to accommodate and facilitate for dogs, ex and other manipulators (you know who you are). And so this is my prison... my groundhog day.
What I think I learned this morning: God really wants me to start my life!

Let's see I have to find a grateful:
I will see the boy today, hurray!
I am alone.. alone... yes alone, in a room while dogs and partner are away downstairs.
I can sip my coffee and surf the net because I have no set plans this lazy Sunday morning.

MY Goals:
finish an article I had been writing
get myself ready to be "knocked up" even if it means I am one of the positive single mother pregnancies in the United States
make my own money and spend it on a cute little cottage (just enough for just a few dust balls and Irish lace)- less is better... less is always better!

Ahhhh it is Sunday and I still have my day to live- what about yours?
I don't know about you but I am ready to make some magic happen! So what if I rolled off onto the WRONG side of the bed this morning! Life begins again and again as each breath we take.... that's the miracle of life, it is the gift we are given; the present!
So I am here to sprinkle a little fairy dust on y'all and to say JUST BEGIN again, no matter what you might have said, did or acted like in that one grouchy/mean past scene- you got the gift; the present! JUST DO IT!

Does it have to be?

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Sun, 28 Oct 2007 10:24:00 +0000

Today is my son's birthday party, and although I did NOT get him for his actual birthday I am still grateful for this day.
What I am having a hard time dealing with is my need to control others. I can't make the ME of me stop stressing over how the house looks when there will be people stopping by for cake so why should I try to control selfish people who sit on a couch with hands down there pants flipping through random channels on TV?
It's not to much to ask to know that I stress and battle with my inner sense of self when visitors will be coming. I can feel it coming on days before the actual event.
I panic over "tumbleweeds" (dust balls and dog hair) escaping from the vacuum cleaners path, I fret over ebony dog hair all over white molding (can others see what I see?). It is a sickness brought on by years of modeling an OCD mother with a career as a registered nurse.
So here is goes.... I am upset over a silly yet ongoing issue in regards to her and some boundary setting, which pushes me into a state of "I have to put up walls" mode.
So suffering from stomach aches and just sheer laziness from a rainy Saturday I finally got my energy to begin what I like to call "this is me and just freaking deal with it" mode. So I am cleaning walls and moving objects that possibly did not need to be moved, but I could not talk to my inner child when I am in this state.
So she asks me (mind you this is when I am STILL in "I have to put up my walls" mode), "honey do you need any help?" Are you freaking kidding me, is the Vatican a shady money making business? HELL yes! I need some type of help, but instead I can't show that I am HELPLESS! That would mean that I can't keep the Superhero gear, and I am all about masks and costumes. So I spit out, "forget it, NO!" What I mean is "Yes, can't you see I am running like a chicken without a head and I am panicking because I don't like to socialize or let others see this faulty broken down house." But those words never reach my lips. Instead it is all about anger.. push away! I "hate you" mode... push away. Until I am moving last summer (finally) air conditioners out of rooms and attempting to move around furniture's in the boy's room.
I am spent and so I walk with my head held high into the kitchen proving that I, Jeannine, do NOT need anyone (please help me!).
And what do my resentful eyes see:

Yes a sink full of dirty dishes and an overflowing garbage... hmmm! Ok I can see you not wanting to scrub bathroom toilet but C'MON give a girl a break! Couldn't you at LEAST see that this is NOT PLAYING fair????? I mean to her SHE USES the excuse well I ASKED so it's ok to just sit there, right? No, she knows I am prideful and stubborn just as well as I know that she is always broken/sick and in fear of finances, does that mean I am going to talk about her fears over money - HELL NO, I am going to ignore that part of her and attempt to work on figuring out things to make us comfortable (together). I don't like doing the bills, in fact I am down right fearful of money and bills but I do them because her fears are bigger than mine. It is what I do to make her day run just a little smoother. Couldn't she have at least picked up a freaking pot and moved it to the dishwasher without me asking?
After seeing the disaster in the kitchen it pushed me (once again) into panic/resentful mode. I saw her sleeping like a princess on the living room couch ("taking a cat nap") so I flicked her arm and said, "couldn't you at least empty the garbage?" So she gets up growls, mutters and complains and this is what I get from that whole ordeal:

C'mon give a sista' a break! She couldn't EVEN put a bag in the garbage!! So I just started piling crap in... let her clean her own mess up! She started it (grabbing my crayons and running home).
So I am up NOW since 6 AM, leg shaking because I have YET to do all that I need to do.
And I have to confess from all that anger that I bottled overnight I was able to scrub (on my hands and knees people that's the way it is done in the Shlape house) most of the floors. However, not all my negative "evil" energy was used up so I did a bad bad thing... I will have to "pay it forward" all day to erase this Karma, but I was mad and feeling dissed and dismissed by her I decided to pour the remaining amounts of coffee down the sink and start a fight. There was "get a job you lazy ass" and then the ball bounced to me "I am moving back to DC"... it was like a toxic tennis match with words as the quick served balls. I hope my point was proven, it was all about "you didn't ask me if you wanted coffee" even though I KNEW she always does, but it's the same thing with helping someone clean they may not ask or tell you they need help, but of course they do!
Well I have no finale to this.... because I have to go get my son and finish cleaning, oh and the dishes THEY ARE STILL IN THE FREAKING SINK! 'NUFF said!

just a babble on hump day

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Wed, 03 Oct 2007 13:37:00 +0000

Things I am working on today:
1. Procrastination
a. I will pack lunch and snack and write pick up note the night before so I am not running like an Olympic contender in the morning.

2. Reach Zen and find some Tao in my DAY-O
a. I will not go head to head with a soon to be 5 year old over mismatched clothes and sandals in the rain. I will allow God to help me "choose my own battles" accordingly.

3. Ignore and not let others words bother me
a. I will not allow my two "catty" next door neighbors who practice opposite Christian like behavior while going to church every Sunday to hurt me with their ice words.
Don't you just love those bigots who don't practice what God preaches?
NO I didn't ask to live at the library and I CANNOT "shut up" my dogs voices, they are DOGS and they will bark especially when left unattended, thank you very much.
NO I will not go in a panic when my DOGS bark.
AND YES I will allow them to be DOGS and if they can't stand the noise then they can purchase ear plugs or SELL and go infect someone else with their negativity.

An "ah-ha" moment today:

~Maybe it is because I am sleep deprived, waking up every night at 2'ish AM in a stress panic, but this morning my son was spelling out D.O.G and G.O.D ... hmmm God and Dog has the same letters. Did you ever hear of the story about a man who asked God to dinner and God said yes. So the man made a big feast and invited all of his friends and while he waited for God a stray dog jumped on his table and started eating his feast. He was so angry that the dog was eating all his food before God came that he beat the dog and shooed him away. The dog yelped and ran away from the man's attack. His friends left and said "I knew he wouldn't come" The next day the man saw God and said "why didn't you come, my friend don't believe in you." God said "I was there, I was the dog that you attacked and beat. You said to come hungry and so I came as a dog." The moral of the story is to believe and have faith AND that all life force has God in it. So when my neighbor says something abusive to me one more time about my "annoying" animals I am going to say "talk to God HE's in the house." If that doesn't wake her up to some sort of loving kindness than my off the wall comment may just drive her away for good!

Peace out peeps and have a laugh your ARSE off kinda HUMP day-Y'all!

It's a Hard Knock Life...

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Tue, 02 Oct 2007 13:06:00 +0000

I was cleaning the kitchen sink overwhelmed with starched filled pots, cereal bowls and getting down and dirty with a leftover Thermos halfway filled with yesterday's "Chickarena" soup for my boy's school lunch. I thought about the bad press on SAHM (stay at home moms). The media often portrays us as incompetent Spa obsessed unmotivated socialites. Ygads, you mean you have NOT USED YOUR bachelors degree in Behavioral Science? (people question). "So like your like a sit home mom and like what do you like do?" (another interesting question) I use my degree, it is never easy to deal with a child in the throws of a tantrum or dealing with the teenage angst and bubbling hormones of this generations youth with their "OMG please do NOT follow me into the mall but do you like ummm like have an extra credit card I can like borrow for just like an hour or like so" I provide options for conflict resolution situations. I also HAVE to multi task, I save money that babysitters and house cleaners or even maintenance workers would HAVE/or still would cost. I also supply comfort and safety when they run into the house after a long day at school. And even I am not an "excellent driver" I still put on my "soccer mom" hat for an errand or activity or several at a time. I may be working without pay, but it is the hardest job that I ever had- and the LONELIEST!
As I scanned the house it proved there was a sort of disease of clutter and showed proof that children ran into rooms with a Tasmania devil's mindset. For example, this morning as I balanced my sanity with positive affirmations I dealt with a short temper tantrum from my four year old in regards to his breakfast boycott. The oatmeal was too hot! He waited! Then the oatmeal was too "liquidy", I added more oatmeal. He waited! Then the oatmeal was too "lumpy", I added his Soy milk. He waited! All while watching "Spongebob". I gave several prompts. I tried techniques offered by the best parents magazines. Nothing! He just waited! I suggested that I would feed him. No response! This was happening while I was preparing his snack and lunch for school. Due to the fact that he has many allergies I decided macaroni would be a suitable choice. Pot bubbling, kid talking back, multi tasking with snack/lunch needs, and I finally gave him the ultimatum either eat or I would turn off the TV. You would think I said there will be no Christmas this year, bombs went off! He screamed, and temper tantrum ensued. I took as many deep breaths that I could remember from my very brief Yoga experience. Pot boiled over my freshly clean flat top stove. I quickly thought of steps: 1. shut off and protect stove from boiling pot. 2. calm the startled and sensitive Wheaten dog whose mother must have smoked crack because he can't function through too much stimuli. 3. gave Gavin a choice, first I shut off the TV and let him fall off the deep end until I could reel him back to the present with my voice "THIS IS THE VOICE" (using my best "TransAmerica" line). while offering to feed him with gentle motherly love. Sanity occurred! He apologized and God smiled! Life was good at that moment, UNTIL I realized we were going to be late for drop off at the school. Running followed! Lots of running and movement here... all a blur!
Teeth brushed
Book bag packed
shoes laced
face washed
medicines administered
Rocco caged (he is a danger to himself when I am gone)
Yet house still a destruction, I was not fazed I could do it with a "Rocky" mentality of all work and no play (except this fast typing post).
I somehow managed to get me and the little man out of the house with minutes to spare, even when I asked him to join his life and get a jacket and the only thing he could find was a very heavy bright yellow WINTER coat. Around the house, once again, running for a light Fall sweatshirt and we are buckled into the car with free XM for three months! God is good, we have the Disney channel and the little man loves to sing loud and proud!
School was packed with kids and parents. We waited, he had feelings that I would not attend with him. I wish life could be like the movie Billy Madison, I wouldn't mind going back and starting all over with him. Most of it is because I miss his little steps throughout the day. I also would love to protect him from all the blows and storms of life.
But today is a good day, there was no tears. He blew me a kiss and walked down the hallway. Gym is today! He was anticipating some fun games.
And I have now slipped back into housecleaning mode. It will be more than a few hours that I will sing "It's a Hard Knock Life" while I scrub floors on my knees, not because I have a "hard life" but because I always wanted to be ANNIE (hey a girl can dream) and no one can hear me belting out those musical tunes.
Ok, wish me luck! I have high hopes that I can clean house, get up to the second with laundry, put all clothes away and still design some flyers for my at home business all before getting my boy at bus time.
Wish HIM luck too, its his FIRST karate class tonight.
Let's hope his homework will be easy and he has his listening ears on!
LIFE IS one awesome ride!Always grateful!

Who needs Mr. Myagi? When you got natural talent...

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Tue, 02 Oct 2007 10:07:00 +0000

It's official, big boy is now in the Tae Kwon Do program! He was walking on air when he slipped into his uniform. He didn't like the "have to earn your belt" idea, but he really put in the foot work. Once I cut and slice the video I will put some for some eyes to view. He will learn perserverance, discipline, self confidence, respect and self control.
It was a big day for the little man. He has a girlfriend named Hannah, shhhh she doesn't even know it yet! He colored his face at the request of no one in his Kindergarten class and EARNED his white belt in a private session at Tae Kwon Do (the home of his "sister in his heart" who made BLACK BELT in April and is now in her "Black Belt" program).
His life is moving in a great direction!
My partner also earned him 5000 Webkinz points for him to go shopping for more beds for his two pets (he has a bed fetish, he buys beds and goes penniless).
I think he is practicing LOA (law of attraction) and he didn't even tell me.
Now if I can only wake him up!
LIFE IS beautiful! Save a tree, hug a friend, LOVE an enemy~Pay it forward- Y'all!

short enough for you Jones? :O

noreply@blogger.com (Eeyore and Poppins) — Mon, 01 Oct 2007 13:28:00 +0000

I Am